Food runs my life.


I have at least one fight a day with Charlotte over eating.  She just will not eat dinner!  Ever!!  No matter what I do, unless it’s chicken nuggets or grilled cheese, she refuses dinner.  Every night.  Tonight, Cody made delicious hamburgers and corn on the cob.  Charlotte ate a cheese slice.  No, not even “real” cheese.  An actual processed cheese slice.  Then threw a fit until we finally just released her to go and do what she wanted while the three of us ate.  It’s ridiculous.  I vow to turn it around… I have my books, my websites, and my recipes.  I will find a way to win this fight, so help me God!


My father in law is now doing chemo.  He’s had a set back, there seems to be an issue with his bowel now.  They are optimistic that it won’t become serious and he should be able to come home soon.  As with many chemo patients, food is unappealing at the moment and that will only contribute to his digestive issues… so what can Beanie do to help?  Food.  I bought a ridiculously expensive book with freezer meal recipes (along with my own favorite dishes that are good for the freezer!) and I am going to cook, cook, cook.  I will feed my family to keep them healthy and strong.  When my mother in law is too tired to cook, or my sister in laws are just too distracted to make meals, I want them to be able to reach for something homemade.  It makes me feel helpful.  It makes me feel useful.  I love to cook and I love my family – as crazy as they make me – so, I hope these meals will feed their bellies and their souls.


I am a binge eater.  There is no doubting that.  I have a terrible relationship with food.  Maybe one day I will get into it, but not tonight.  Anyway, I am always talking about how I need to be better, do better, eat better.  Better better better.  And then we started talking about having another child.  So, I started to “track ovulation” which is pretty much like trying to find a leprechaun catching a ride on a unicorn.  No period, bad period, random bleeding.  Off to the doctor I went and she decided to send me to an endocrinologist to look at my blood work.  Well, dear old diabetes is yet again totally out of control.  Like, super out of control.  We decided to switch over to insulin again, but a month later and things are still nuts.  I have an A1C that is literally double what it should be and a fasting sugar that is double and a bit.  No matter what I do!  At my appointment yesterday, my doc suggested that it was possible I am not Type 2 diabetic, that it is possible I am Type 1 diabetic and was misdiagnosed.  After reading about LADA, it makes a lot of sense.  And it fits me and my situation.  I was 24 when I was diagnosed and about 40 pounds heavier than I am now.  And since that time (10 friggen years!), I’ve gone from Metformin to adding in Diamicron, Invokana, Glumetza; tried Humalog, Humulin, and Lantus.  I am now currently taking NovoRapid and Levemir, which are bringing the numbers down… but I am also taking over 100 units of insulin a day!!   I go back to the doctor in 2 weeks and will be tested for Type 1 and hopefully we will be on a maintenance plan instead of more adjustments.

All of that said, I carb counted today and my numbers were good-ish.  However… I feel so hungry.  And its possible that it’s my mind just tricking me; it’s possible that I am adjusting; it’s possible that I’m actually hungry.  And most people would say to just have a snack, but WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN.  Everything is different!  I would have an apple with some peanut butter, but my sugars will be fucked.  My body is so super sensitive to eating anything.  No, I don’t always eat the best… but I am not the worst, either!


That was a jumbled mess.  Like my brain these days.  Stay tuned for something more coherent next time!




ps – I am eating the apple.

Just Call Me “Chef beanie”, Thanks

Generally, Penelope and Apple don’t like puréed food.  Penelope tolerates it a little better than Apple, however, it’s still touch and go.  Apple has been so stubborn and independent since the day she was born, we were almost forced into baby led weaning because she wants to feed herself!  She won’t even take a sippy cup – she MUST use a cup and straw.  Honestly, this kid is nuts.  Now, most of the time you will find whole pieces of food on their tables while I watch like a hawk, ready to administer CPR at any given moment.  Thankfully, it’s never come to that and I pray it never does.

In an effort to feed myself and my babies, I’ve decided to make lunch at the beginning of the week and reheat throughout the week.  On Sunday I made a one-pot pasta and thought I’d share with you all!  It was easy, fast, and reheats well.  P&C both liked it as well, which was good.  When I plopped down to eat, I would scoop some out for the girls and away we went.


chicken, diced (I used 3 boneless, skinless thighs)

1 cup (or more) onion, diced

salt, pepper

2 cups of chicken broth

3 cups of water

pasta (I used shells so it would be a good size for the girls)

1 cup of milk

2 cups of sharp cheddar cheese

4 cups of broccoli, chopped



Sauté chicken in oil until almost cooked through.  Add diced onion, salt, and pepper and Sauté until no longer pink.  Add broth, water, and pasta and continue to cook, covered, for 20 minutes.  Add milk, cheese, and broccoli and cook until broccoli is soft and cheese is melted.

You can spice as you see fit, I guess.  Mine is pretty bland because I intended to feed this to the girls as well.  Next time, I think I would add mushrooms as well – because I LOVE mushrooms.


Watch for this weeks lunch recipe:  Cheesy Broccoli and Chicken Rice Bake!